Breastfeeding: Journeying On

Breastfeeding has not been an easy feat for me. It started out to be toe-curlingly painful. When Cole breastfed it felt like he was biting my nipple really hard instead of merely sucking it. Did I mention that Cole came out of me an expert sucker? Yeah. He does not suffer from a weak sucking reflex - that's for sure. The nurses at the birth center nicknamed him Hoover (like the vacuum). About a week into breastfeeding, I learned by going to a maternity store that the problem was not my son's powerful sucking ability, but it was the pillow I was using. How weird is that?

Keith and I went to Waddle and Swaddle in Poughkeepsie to buy a carrier for Cole. While there, I happened to mention to the saleswoman that my back was killing me from hunching over while breastfeeding. She asked me what kind of pillow I used. I told her the Boppy Pillow, which was a shower gift and something I registered for. She then introduced me to My Brest Friend, the world's best breastfeeding pillow ever. Turns out, the Boppy doesn't keep the baby level with my breasts so he was actually pulling at my nipples and that's why they were so damned sore (and had also started to crack). I tested the new pillow in the store and sure enough I felt hardly any pain! It was amazing and I was sold. Forget the carrier- I left there with a new breastfeeding pillow. And Joann, if you are reading this, I still use the Boppy, just not for breastfeeding.

This week I friended Waddle and Swaddle on Facebook and they shared this article about breastfeeding in public. It got me thinking about how I have lost most of my modesty since giving birth. Here are a few examples: Keith and I shared the birth pictures with some friends and family and there were lots of nipple shots and one vagina shot and I couldn't have cared less. (My father on the other hand, covered his face and that made me laugh). I also whip out my nipple to breastfeed to whoever is standing in front of me and I don't care. The other morning, Peter came by to drop something off and Keith came in and asked if Peter could come in to say hi. I said, "Sure, but he may see a nipple so he should be forewarned." Needless to say, he didn't come in to say hi. 

But back to breastfeeding in public. I've written about it before in my pregnancy blog. I wrote about how I wasn't sure if I should get one of those cover ups. I've since decided not to, but I have used a small blanket. And I have not yet had the need to breastfeed anywhere but our house, our car, the doctor's office, and the maternity store I mentioned above. Those are innocuous places and so I have not yet gone up against ignorant people like the ones mentioned in the article who behave as if breastfeeding in public is a sinful act that must be kept hidden from the public, especially children.

Now that breastfeeding is not as painful, I realize how beneficial it is, not only for Cole, but for me as well. I can look at him, talk to him, connect with him in ways that I wouldn't do if I were not breastfeeding. With that said, I have to admit that I do not enjoy it as other mothers do or the way the  La Leche League claims we as mothers naturally should.  (I'm reading The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding, a text published by the LLL). What I do enjoy is that my milk is so nourishing and my body so soothing that Cole almost always falls asleep in

the folds of my breast. This picture is from the hospital. Gazing down at my son while he sleeps on me is the purest form of entertainment.