Breastfeeding Issues: The Definitive TMI Report

Breastfeeding has its challenges. I'm glad I didn't know about them beforehand. I might've said, "No, thank you" and bottle fed instead. After all, I had no breastfeeding role models growing up. It was only later in my pregnancy that I really considered breastfeeding.  Thankfully, when I was pregnant I had good role models: My mother-in-law and my friend, Allison. From their experiences, I felt I could and should breastfeed. I am very happy I chose to do it. I feel such a strong bond with my son. I know there are so many benefits to breastfeeding, but to me, that closeness is the strongest reason of all, especially when I am away from him 9.5 hours of each day. That being said, I haven't been so lucky as far as the things that can go wrong while breastfeeding. And it's during times like these (when some of these things happen at the SAME time) that I feel like giving up. But then I think of that relationship we have and I feel such tremendous sadness at the potential loss of that relationship that I veto the idea right away. It's like when I was an hour away from giving birth. It was then that I felt like giving up and getting the drugs. But I knew in my heart of hearts I wouldn't do that. I knew I could do it. I knew I was strong enough, but there was still this tiny piece of doubt there. But as I said it to Keith (I think I said something like: "How did I ever think I could do this without drugs???!!") I knew I didn't want them. I just needed to say it (or scream it).

Here's the TMI report:
Since breastfeeding, I've had the following things recur on a regular basis. All of the issues I've faced are uncomfortable and painful.
1) milk blisters
2) clogged duct (same one over and over) because of the milk blisters
3) supply issues
4) sore, cracked nipples
5) bacterial infections
6) yeast infections

If I would have my damn period already, #5 might not keep happening. It's nice not having to spend money on sanitary pads or have to worry about cramps or PMS, but really, I think 18 months is long enough to go without having your period.

I still have not figured out why I keep getting # 1 and #2. But here's how it resolves, much to my surprise: I get engorged, Cole nurses, it pops and the duct clears. How weird is that? Doesn't it seem counter-intuitive to let my breast get engorged while I have a clogged duct? Yes, it does. And THAT is why I believe the ducts are not a problem INSIDE my breast, but are merely caused by the blister on my NIPPLE. But my doctor doesn't think so. And that's why she said Friday that I should see a breast specialist if I want someone to fix it because she sure as hell couldn't. (And she tried - at my request). Consequently, I've decided to no longer seek help for this problem. I should just trust in my son's ability to be a nursing champ and let him clear it up.

And there is finally good news to report on #3 - I pumped one ounce from my breast yesterday and another ounce today. Some of you are thinking, how is one ounce good? Well, the right breast has always had less milk. The most I've ever pumped from there was 3 ounces and that must have been at the peak of production, because one to two ounces was the usual amount to come from there. And just a few weeks ago, I was pumping drops. I had hardly any milk coming out of there AND it would take around 10 minutes for anything to come out. So the milk is flowing more quickly AND I am getting much more than those measly drops. The bad news is that Cole still does not want to nurse on that side. He does when he's really tired - usually right before bed or in the middle of the night. But he gives up fairly quickly at all other times.  It's funny, because he's usually a determined little baby. Once he wants to do something, nothing will stop him. So my guess is, he dislikes nursing on that side now, because he got so comfortable and used to nursing on the left side. Thank goodness for my Medela Harmony Manual Breast Pump. That thing rocks!