Fast forward to 5:30 a.m. the next morning. I start my car, plug my music into my car speaker wire and out of the speakers flows the voice of the lead singer of Passenger singing "Let her go," and I just lost it.
I literally sobbed for a good five minutes. I had to talk myself into leaving. Really. I was reminded of the challenging times I had during the summer when I was not appreciative of my circumstances. I felt a deep pang of regret for not loving every single minute, because it ends. It ends every single year and I know this, yet I still let things get to me. I still get annoyed and want time alone. But at 5:30 on that first morning back? I wished I could get out of that car, crawl back into bed and wake up with my babies.
I hadn't felt that emotional about returning to work since I put Cole in daycare for the first time. That was 4 years ago. Eventually, I convinced myself that I could do it. I could leave. I would get through this with a smile on my face. I learned an important lesson that morning and I hope it sticks with me for many summers to come.
And I know now that every summer is just going to get better and better and it's going to get harder and harder to say goodbye, throw my teacher bag over my shoulder and head to a high school of 2,200 students before dawn. But I will do it. I am lucky enough to be able to have a job that gives me 8 weeks off during the most beautiful season of the year. I will enjoy it.
It has been almost 3 weeks since I returned to work and I can now say that I finally feel things are shifting back to "normal" again. We are trying to soak up every nice day, so on days that I pick up Cole from after care at pre-school, I try to give us a little bit of alone time together - whether we're exploring the outside of his pre-school or trying to catch frogs at Willow Kiln Park, or making homemade pizza - so that he can get what he so longed for this summer. Keith and Cole also get a little bit of alone time before school and after Bevin is dropped off two days a week. Even though it sucks to be gone 10 hours a day, it is still nice to be in a routine again.
And did I mention Cole started our district's pre-school program on Sept. 3? He goes to a half day program 5 days a week now. He has an awesome classroom teacher and the class has a therapy dog named Sophie. He talks about this dog more than he talks about the letters they are studying. He seems to love the arts and crafts that are directly related to the letters they are studying. He even gets to do activities with a mobile smartboard that the entire school shares.
I hadn't felt that emotional about returning to work since I put Cole in daycare for the first time. That was 4 years ago. Eventually, I convinced myself that I could do it. I could leave. I would get through this with a smile on my face. I learned an important lesson that morning and I hope it sticks with me for many summers to come.
And I know now that every summer is just going to get better and better and it's going to get harder and harder to say goodbye, throw my teacher bag over my shoulder and head to a high school of 2,200 students before dawn. But I will do it. I am lucky enough to be able to have a job that gives me 8 weeks off during the most beautiful season of the year. I will enjoy it.
It has been almost 3 weeks since I returned to work and I can now say that I finally feel things are shifting back to "normal" again. We are trying to soak up every nice day, so on days that I pick up Cole from after care at pre-school, I try to give us a little bit of alone time together - whether we're exploring the outside of his pre-school or trying to catch frogs at Willow Kiln Park, or making homemade pizza - so that he can get what he so longed for this summer. Keith and Cole also get a little bit of alone time before school and after Bevin is dropped off two days a week. Even though it sucks to be gone 10 hours a day, it is still nice to be in a routine again.
And did I mention Cole started our district's pre-school program on Sept. 3? He goes to a half day program 5 days a week now. He has an awesome classroom teacher and the class has a therapy dog named Sophie. He talks about this dog more than he talks about the letters they are studying. He seems to love the arts and crafts that are directly related to the letters they are studying. He even gets to do activities with a mobile smartboard that the entire school shares.
Following this are some pictures of the past few weeks that I took after school or that Keith has sent me while I am at work.
Cole's new haircut
Happy morning!
Thank you Elmo for giving Daddy a break
Stewart's breakfast before school
The chaos of weekday mornings
All dressed up
Cole's preschool orientation
Riding in the "car car"
Early wake up calls for daddy
Naptime
Mommy Bevin selfie
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